|
| My cousin's bby is such a pussy.
&& I still don't have internet.
You guys are missing out on shit.
No lie.
| | |
| Am I even a human being anymore?
Maybe, but a lonely one.
Who doesn't talk.
Who doesn't feel.
Who doesn't breathe.
Who doesn't have anyone.
Am I even worth saving?
Am I even worth fixing?
Does anyone even know I'm here?
| | |
| I have no one to watch Jude on the weekends anymore.
It's looking like I'm gonna have to go back to being a SAHM.
I really don't want to. I'll go nuts having to stay here 24/7 like I use to.
I'll go nuts not having a paycheck that actually belongs to me.
I'm already going nuts without a vehicle.
My life is such a mess which according to my mom is my fault because I chose to have a bby.
Srry I didn't have an abortion, Mom. I know that's what you wanted.
But since I didn't, Jude is sitting on my lap right now, talking on the cell.
I'm about to make lunch && Grandma is on the way here even though that's just gonna be more drama to deal with cause she's gonna get here && bitch && bitch && tell me everything's my fault also.
But she called && was all, "I wanna walk Jude in his car."
So I said, "W/e. Do what you want."
njkhgmgfndfcmv,b.nvcxrdn
That's how I feel right now.
&& skfnalbsjkvckasna
That's what Sean's g/f looks like right now.
&& lsjkjaskhvjbal;sdmnlas
Is what Nikki's excuse will be when she moves away && doesn't tell me.
&& s;lkafnjbhsvjbdcnasmdka
Is all that ever comes out of Terry Wayne's mouth.
&& sknfbhbsakanlanbdsd
Is all that comes out of mine.
| | |
| I never thought I would be coming home with no car, three prescriptions, && an awful memory to store in the back of my head.
I was on the way to my dad's house && on the phone with my sister.
While I waited for the light to turn green, I turned around && noticed Jude had fallen asleep.
"Oh, Peyton," I said, "I'm gonna have to turn around, he's passed out."
The light turned green && she started to say something, but then I before I could turn left, I noticed the truck a little to close to me.
Everything went in slow motion like they say it does.
I stared && thought, "He's going to stop in time."
&& Then I thought again, "No. He's going to hit me."
And he did.
The phone flew out my hand, my sister could hear me on the other end, scream, and my entire body was lurched upwards and around and I hit my head on something really hard.
He drove around me && without thinking I jumped out the car, screaming, "Jude! Jude!"
&& He was screaming && I ran around to his side && got him out the carseat though medically I shouldn't have moved him.
A lady ran up && asked if the bby was ok.
&& He just cried && cried.
&& Some how even with my bad luck, an ambulance was sitting at the stop light && had watched the entire thing.
Jude was crying and crying and soon as the man took him out my arms, he quit crying, looked up && said, "Car?"
He was okay, but I was in shock && in hysterics.
&& I couldn't even remember if it was my fault, so as they were walking me over to the ambulance and the throb in my head started to kick in, I just kept repeating over and over, "The light was green, wasn't it? It was green, right?"
Anytime I've ever had a conversation about wrecks, I've always said, I could care less if it happened as long as Jude wasn't in the car with me and he was.
They would say, "Are you okay?" && I would say, "He's alright, right?" && They would say, "Yes. Now are you okay?"
It was awful. I finally calmed down && they told me I could go get my purse && phone out the car.
So I got out the ambulance, saw my head lights && glass && metal && shit in the road && just started bawling again.
They shoved forms in my face to sign.
It took my dad and Denise 20 minutes to get there when they only live 2 minutes away from where it happened.
Then my boyfriend came and was mad cause I didn't go in the ambulance, so then he took us to the ER since the ambulance didn't even check us out to make sure we were really okay.
Jude is perfectly fine except for bruises from where the carseat straps dug into him.
My head is throbbing and hurts whenever someone touches it, but besides that I'm just sore in my neck, shoulders, and arms.
They gave me three different medications && tomorrow me && Jude have to follow up with our regular drs.
But that's what happened to us.
My car didn't make out so good.
He hit me in the driver's side tire which snapped some important rods or w/e && my car is only worth maybe $850, so yeaaa.
It's totaled. I have to go clean everything out of it tomorrow.
I don't know what I'm going to do about getting to work.
Or how I'm going to keep my sanity by being stuck in the house.
Or most important how I'm going to afford a new car.
I know we'll get some money && my mom is planning to sue, but still cars are a lot of money.
*sigh* Yeppp.
My day was one big suprise. | | |
| Yea. I went to Bayside last night.
But before that, I went && saw my Godson.
He is teeny tiny.
I love him.
=] <3
&& Then yeaa . . . Bayside.
We got there pretty early.
Both local bands were decent.
Then Bayside came on && they put on a fabulous show.
But I'll tell you one thing that ruins a show is when there are these kids that are all, "Don't shove me."
Hello! Have you ever been to a concert before?
What fucking idiots/ I was beside them, so when the crowd would shove my way, the kid would fucking elbow me in the rib cage.
I was honestly about to knock his ass out.
But besides them, like I said Bayside was great.
But then afterward, they wouldn't let anyone out back by the band's request.
So TJ was all, "W/e. I'll go knock on their bus door to get you a picture."
So we went around back && Anthony, the singer, was out there.
&& TJ asked if I could get a picture, so we took one.
&& I tried to talk to him, but he was just like, "Uh huh. Bye."
Well, we went back in cause I wanted to see the whole band when they got done showering.
&& While we were waiting, we went to look @ the merch.
&& There was this gorgeous hat with the Bayside bird on it, so I was, "OMG! I want."
&& Merch guy was all, "This is the last one we have && they're not making it any more. SoOOoOOo . . . if you want it, you should probably buy it."
So I was all trying to check my bank account on TJ's phone when this kid came up && was about to buy it && I was, "If that kid doesn't buy it, it means I'm suppose to buy it."
&& He didn't.
&& Then TJ's phone wouldn't let me check my bank account.
So then Merch guy let me check it on his laptop.
&& I ran all the way to the car with my boobs flopping Baywatch style to get my debit card because Merch guy was in the process of packing up.
&& So I went through all this work, spent $25 on a fucking hat, && then went over to where Bayside was to get them to sign it.
&& It was so weird cause usually bands @ NBT are usually split up, conversing with fans, && having a good time, but Bayside was all together with no fans even trying to talk to them, && just being fucking antisocial douchebags.
But I asked anyway for them to sign it && he was like, "Yea," && didn't even look at me. Just passed the hat around && went on with their conversation.
So the whole rest of the way home, I was annoyed && felt fucking betrayed that a band I've been listening to since I was 14 turned out to be fucking unappreciative, cock suckers.
I don't care how big you are. Your fans are what makes you && we deserve you to give us two seconds of your time.
For God sake's, I saw 3oh3 @ 'effin NBT && they were nicer than that.
But yeaaaa . . . glad I found that out before I got my next tattoo cause I was going to get a piece for them.
Now I definitely will not.
But like TJ said, they're from NYC.
Sums it all up. =]
Hahahahaha.
Bayside put on a great show, but personality wise, the merch guy was nicer than them.
Thxs guys.
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